Not feeling clever anymore

[itsallovernow]

I'd like the 76 Trombones in my head to stop marching and for my vision to unblur.

I'd like the part of my brain that vacated when I decided to buy self-tanning cream for my back to return.

I'd like part 9B of Blue Eyes to be written already.

I'd like to lay on my couch and follow through with my prescribed plan to watch Clyde Bruckman's Final Repose, Young Frankenstien and Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom.

I'd like to bail on dancing tomorrow night. My only consolation is that despite it being ridiculously cheesy, I am going to dance to the theme from Lawerence of Arabia.

I'd like to have the house to myself tonight. Ain't gonna happen.

I'd like M. to actually record a message on our new phone since he bitched about us having a boring, "this is so and so please leave a message" message. The options he and G. came up with include the following:

a) Welcome to M. and Thea's. And yes, we're still pissed at SciFi for cancelling Farscape. You may now leave a message. (They're sucking up, but I love them anyway. They have no intention of using this one).

b) Welcome to Tyrell Corporation. Replicants please press 1, all others press 2. (The phone doesn't have two lines - this doesn't seem to have stalled their efforts any).

c) Hello and welcome to M. and Thea's (this said in the moviefone voice). For a sensitive, sophisticated comedy about life in L.A., press one, etc.

Why can't they just say, hey, we're not here, leave a message? It's actually infringing on M.'s manhood that I want us to sound like adults when people call us. His friends all have obnoxious messages, so he feels left out. Boys are just so weird. They have now started to call and make fun of the electronic voice that plays in lieu of a greeting.

ETA: Bender meets Tyrell Corp.. This almost made my head stop hurting.

Comments

[veritykindle.livejournal.com]

Hee! This reminds me of that radio program, "Wait, Wait Don't Tell Me", where the main prize is Carl Castle's voice on the winning person's answering machine. (I have no idea who Carl Castle is supposed to be, but he does have a very distinctive voice. :) )

They had a question once where they described some potential answering machine messages, and asked the caller to pick the one that was a real message that Carl Castle recorded. It turned out to be the one where the family from that house claimed that they had Carl Castle tied up in the basement, and then you could hear Carl's voice saying "Help, help, they are all crazy!", or something like that. *giggle* I loved that one!

I've always wanted to win something like that, because I am absolutely terrible with answering machine messages. :)

I hope your head feels better soon!

Re:

[thassalia.livejournal.com]

Thank you:) Carl Castle is a reporter for NPR with - obviously- a very distinct voice:) " Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me" is definitely a giggle fest.

[cofax7]

I SO want Carl Kassel (sp?) to record my voicemail message. It would be unutterably cool.

And yes, WaitWait Don't Tell Me! Rules. As does SaysYou!, which is particularly fun for the writer types.

Re:

[thassalia.livejournal.com]

I think you're right on the spelling. That's gotta be my answering machine solution. I'll just call into WWDTM and try to win:) And I love Says You. I'm an NPR junky though. I'd marry Ira Glass in a heartbeat.