Summer!! Where Did You Go?

[itsallovernow]

I know most of you are dying for it to be cooler (and I love fall, I really do, despite the low grade depression it tends to bring on for me). But I love summer as well, I like to be warm, I like wearing skimpy, skimmy clothes, and running around without my shoes. I just want a little more time with you summmer!! Is that so much to ask? (Here in So Cal, we get summer weather for another month, but somehow, as the days get shorter, it's just not the same).

Had a weekend of surreal movies (Greenaway's A Zed and Two Noughts - conclusion: totally worth seeing, brash and brassy and weirdly funny in places and has possibly ruined twins for me utterly. Definitely has ruined zebras.) Also, a weekend of excellent sushi (whoever invented the fried rice hashbrown is a genius!), and so much expensive cheese that I almost turned into a pile of curds and whey.

However, one of the highlights of the weekend fell yesterday after coming back from Writer's Lock-in. I had put off going to Rite Aid, and had no further excuse, and was standing in the hair removal aisle (in an effort to figure out which product would help me to self-rememdy the unfortunate accidental topiary experiment) when this very cute guy (possibly my age, but not significantly younger) kind of clears his throat, and blushes, and asks if I can help him with something.

Now, this is Rite Aid. Cute and decently groomed are NOT AT ALL proof of sanity. No one is safe from the crazy in Rite Aid, even if it no longer looks like a hideout for serial killers.

So I tentatively said, "Um, maybe."

He blushes again. "You're the only girl in the store," he said, "And I don't know who else to ask."

(Ignore the fact that half of the Rite Aid employees are female. It's really an exercise in frustration to ask them ANYTHING!)

He then points to his neck, and proceeds to ask if there was anything in the store that would cover up the relatively faint hickey.

I - an absolute pillar of restraint - do not start laughing hysterically.

"I use tattoo makeup," I say, "but you can't get that here." (And seriously, this poor boy has NO idea. Tiny little hickey. Just a little bruise. He really has no idea!)

He looks panicky again.

"There's pressed powder," I say. "Or foundation."

He swallows hard. "I hate to ask. I sound like a jerk. Can you show me?"

(I'm wondering, at this point, if very cute boy with a hickey has never had a mother or sisters or a girlfriend, because, dude... powder? Not that hard to identify.)

I ask him how much he wants to spend (being a girly girl is a pricey endeavor).

"I'd spend a $100 if I can cover this up."

(He does not look like someone who has a job that would condemn him for hickeys, but what do I know? I also, again the epitome of restraint, did not say "Pussy!!")

"This'll work," I say, and grab one of the mineral makeup brushes. "Just kind of swirl it around. Just figure out what color."

He looks at me. "They're different colors?" I don't roll my eyes, and pick one for him.

He grins, and blushes again, and pokes at the hickey. "Amateurs, huh?" he says.

"Stop poking it," I tell him. "It'll make it worse."

His eyes get wide again. "Really?"

"Yeah," I say, "Really."

He thanks me, and smiles, and goes to stand in line to pay for his purchase and I go back to contemplating grooming options, and when I see him on my way to the counter, he gives me a little wink and a salute with his makeup.

Really. What are they teaching boys these days?

Comments

[monanotlisa.livejournal.com]

NOT ENOUGH XX-CHROMOSOMES IN HIS LIFE!

Also, no theatre. Everybody should have done that once, and not just for hickey-coverin' reasons. Oh, how the boys LOVED putting on stage make-up, and mind that only *one* of them was (openly) queer..

[thassalia.livejournal.com]

Clearly not enough XX chromosones! And this was a very cute boy!! (Don't know if it meant that the giver of the hickey was not someone he was going to see again, or if the giver of the hickey was another boy. Possible, given where I live, but he was definitely sending off a girl-liking vibe.)

[kerlin.livejournal.com]

That is so completely adorable. And honestly, my two brothers would not have the slightest clue about any of that either, and would have until about two years ago been waaaaaaaay too embarrassed to ask me or my mother, so...I can see them doing this.

[thassalia.livejournal.com]

This guy was totally old enough to either know better, or suck it up that he had a hickey:)

Still, it was hilarious!

[wearemany.livejournal.com]

this is a great story, seriously. i am impressed you managed to avoid asking him about the circumstances of the hickey, because at that point i suspect i would have pressed for details in exchange for advice.

(you're right, though, the rite-aid staff are not helpful AT ALL.)

[thassalia.livejournal.com]

I was trying so hard not to laugh that any solicitation of details would have ended my resolve completely:) (Plus, speculation is king!!)

The killer moment was the, "amateurs, huh?" line, though:)

And dude, even now that it's a serial killer free zone, the Rite Aid people are still the opposite of helpful!

[ainsley.livejournal.com]

Ah! Thank you so much for bringing much-needed laughter to my day.

[thassalia.livejournal.com]

You're more than welcome. It was one of the nicest surreal experiences I've had at Rite Aid.

[jenlev.livejournal.com]

Um- what and incredible moment at the drug store. Surreal.

Yay for cheese...I'm just sayin'.

[thassalia.livejournal.com]

Yay for cheese, yes. But also, oh god, too much cheese!

[jenlev.livejournal.com]

Heh.....I hear the call-o-the cheese from the fridge. Sadly it's not Stilton or Brie. It's organic cheddar. :::pathetic sigh:::

[lomer.livejournal.com]

*lol* That's awesome! I usually cover up unfortunate party accidents with that Neutragena half green, half concealer stick. It's great because the green neutralizes the bruise and the concealer covers up the hickey. I'm still annoyed at my friend for attacking me at a party and giving me a HUGE hickey on my neck. He's gay, he doesn't even LIKE girls! But a great quote came out of it from one of the production team, "Alex! I cannot BELIEVE you gave our male AND female ingenues hickeys!") Yep, he attacked the young male lead as well.

[arthurfrdent.livejournal.com]

I'ma thinkin Lomer has it Party Accident or more to the point drunk accident, that's why the embarassment... and he's trying to conceal, because he/she marked him and there are a whole variety of reasons to not allow that to be public, esp. if he was drunk and doesn't really remember what he/she looked like or who he/she is. For this, his friends may be remarkably unhelpful, especially if he was being stupid. "Dude? You're married now..."

[thassalia.livejournal.com]

Considering it was about 7:30 at night, if he were married now, he'd been in hiding all day:)

[lomer.livejournal.com]

Hey people can't be blamed for what they do drunk! (Okay technically they can, but there SHOULD be some sort of amnesty!)

Also if his male buddy decided to mark him, I can see how that'd be something he might be embarassed about. Hey I'm pretty liberal but even *I* was pretty embarassed when my friend decided it'd be funny to give me a huge hickey when I was the romantic lead in a show. It's hard to play "sweet and innocent" with a giant hickey on your throat!

[raithen.livejournal.com]

I think you should write a series of thematically linked Vignettes from Rite Aid. It would probably sell gangbusters! ;)

[thassalia.livejournal.com]

My experiences at Rite Aid will not at all make me sound like the sane one. But, you are probably not wrong:)