itsallovernow | More Five Things, With Caveat

These are

crankygrrl's ficcy present, partly because she's been having a hell of a time of it lately, and partly because she won the guessing game last week.

She wanted "Five Ways Veronica and Lamb End Up Having Hot Sex (Veronica Mars)" She got four and an almost.

1. Three months before she graduates from college, Logan calls her from Costa Rica. He's on his cell of course, a little drunk of course, slurry and hot and pushing all her buttons and she lets him talk about sliding his hand down the back of her skirt, about kissing her neck, about just what he could do to her in public without anyone knowing. She chokes out, "We broke up," before she hangs up on him. When she comes back out of the bathroom, shoving through a bunch of stumbling sophomores sloshing beer around some 09ers expensive living room, she runs smack into Lamb.

"Huh," she says, "thought they didn't let the sheep out among the wolves anymore." She pauses. "Don't you have anything better to do than arrest underage drinkers? Aren't you like, the sheriff?"

He narrows his eyes, and then shakes his head. "She's not underage anymore."

Veronica raises her eyebrow, moves to past past Lamb, but he grabs her arm. Heat shoots through her body. "We broke up."

She starts to laugh, because it's just impossible, still, to think of Lamb dating Madison Sinclair. Talk about lamb to the slaughter, and Madison getting her just rewards. But his mouth is set kind of hard, like maybe this hurts, maybe it wasn't just skeevy sex with a barely legal girl. His eyes sweep over her and she swallows hard. She's a little bit drunk, and a lot angry, and a lot turned on, with the sound of her ex-boyfriends voice in her ear and this is a very, very bad idea. This is Lamb.

He doesn't let go of her arm, but relaxes his grip, runs his fingers along the back of her arm. She shivers, knees weak, already way too vulnerable, says "fuck it to common sense, to sense in general."

He follows her outside, hand on the small of her back. Her skirt's very short, and the front seat of his patrol car has just enough room and if he'd turned on the siren after he came, she'd have had to kill him. The sex is better than she expected, and she doesn't call Logan back when she gets home, doesn't have him walk through his whole routine again. Now she's got some room to breathe.

2. Lamb's the one who calls her when Keith goes MIA. He's the one who sits with her on the couch in her dad's living room, and then later, on the bench in the morgue when she goes down to identify the body. It's not Keith, and she starts to cry, hating all of them - her dad, and Logan for not being there, and Lilly for being dead and Wallace for being happy and Lamb for being Lamb. Except Lamb's there and he's an asshole, but he puts his arms around her and doesn't say anything and when she turns her face up to him, damp and snotty and blotchy, he doesn't back away. Makes kind of a wisecrack which is all she needs to pull his face down, kiss him hard with a lot of anger and a lot of tongue.

She barely gets her pants off, and he's more careful than she'd thought he'd be and its still all kids of fucked up to be having sex with this guy she kind of hates in the bathroom morgue, but it also feels really, really good with his big, hot hands and his own sort of pissed off I can't believe I'm doing this look on his face and the way he slows down at the end, pinning her against the counter and stroking in hard and hot and slow and then he smiles, at the end, when she comes, like he's glad she did.
They don't talk about it. After. But he does fix all her parking tickets, and when Keith resurfaces, full of apologies, Lamb punches him before taking him to the hospital and calling her.

3. Stanford is happy to grant her a law degree after a bazillion dollars in tuition and three years of her life and no one's more surprised than she is when she takes the ADA job in Neptune.

She goes out for drinks with her co-workers one night, and sees Lamb hanging by the jukebox in jeans and a t-shirt. He leers at her, calls her Veronica Mars like she's still 17 and she doesn't hate him quite as much as she used to. Funny that. She beats him at pool like its some bad 80's movie, but he still asks her to dinner. She thinks he wants to reminisce, piss her off some more. Turns out, he mostly wants to get in her pants.

He's got clean sheets and a decent apartment and he looks way better naked than she'd ever have suspected. It feels a little like coming home, and a lot like a Dali painting and at the end, it just feels like good sex on cotton sheets.

When he says, "We're not so different, Mars," she briefly wonders if she's just a substitute for her father. Decides that, for a month or two, she can very much not care. She had no idea anyone could do that with their penis. She figured in Lamb's case, he had a lot to make up for on other fronts. Penis talents were as good a way as any.

4. She goes to get Logan out of jail, thinking that a DUI was going to make her life more difficult than his. He's still drunk, and he's still sorry, and she'd really, really like to leave him in the cell, let Dick schlep his ass around.

Lamb meets her at the counter while she's filling out the paperwork. "You need a better boyfriend, Mars," he says, and she looks up, expecting a smirk. There isn't one.

She shrugs. "My boyfriend needs to visit the wizard," she says, "see if he'll give him back his brain."

She remembers that conversation a year later when Lamb pulls her over for speeding. She tries to give him the " I was chasing a suspect excuse," but he could clearly see there weren't any other cars on the road.

"Your boyfriend ever find his brain?" he asks. She tilts her head. "No. Not yet." She doesn't blame him. It's not like Logan's had the most stable upbringing. But it stings, still. Lamb writes her a ticket, but when he gives it to her, he kisses her cheek. "You're a pain in the ass, Mars. But you still deserve better."

5. It wasn't like she wanted to be on a stakeout with Lamb. He made fun of her car, kept drinking coffee and then had to go pee in the bushes, and wanted to put the radio on the classic rock station. "Didn't you have to go to special policeman school?" she asked. "Aren't you too old to be rocking out to Aerosmith?"

He just continued to drink coffee and hum Hot for Teacher under his breath.

After three hours of no activity in the house she was ready to give up, but Lamb had been adamant about accompanying her, so worried she knew something he didn't and she wasn't ready to let him off the hook yet. The problem was that, well, she hated him and he was a dick and he was acting like a baby on his first patrol. But he smelled…. really, really good. Like something spicy and warm. Like something she wanted to lick.

And really. That was just so very, very wrong.

It was warm out, and she couldn't turn on the air conditioning – mostly because it had died two summers ago and rent trumped A/C – and that scent was starting to make her dizzy.

"Something wrong, Mars?" His voice skimmed along her nerves, way too pleased with itself, but low and kind of nice. Lamb had a different flavor of smirk than Logan.

"No, just… it's stuffy. I need some fresh air."

He leaned closer. "You sure that's all you need?" Normally, a comment like that would have gotten a nicer guy tasered, but her own brain had clearly shorted out from the heat and whatever magic cologne he'd bartered his soul for.

She gave him a withering look. "Oh, you think you could give me what I need?"

He licked his bottom lip. "Yeah. Yeah, I do."

"Prove it." She glared, still wondering where her brain had gone. He looked at her, eyes flicking down over her mouth, over her collarbones and bare legs. Sweat trickled down between her breasts, pooled in the small of her back.

"Okay," he breathed and slid his hand between her legs. She gasped, grabbed his wrist, ready to elbow him in the face, and then he moved his fingers, rubbing her delicately through the thin fabric of her pants and she gasped again, fingers flexing on his wrist, lessening her hold. He leaned in, sliding his tongue along her neck, breath hot in her ear, continuing to rub in small slow circles. When she came, skull thrust back against the head rest, nails clawing into his arm, he kissed her cheekbone, settled back down in his seat and hummed a little more Aerosmith. Just smirked when she muttered, "Asshole."

ETA: Doctor

_minxy_ wanted "Five Ways Vala overcomes an initial refusal to her advances. Second times the charm, right"

1 – She wants the aid of his fleet and he wants her artillery, but mostly she wants him to want to give her what she's asking for. She puts her hand high up on Ba'al's thigh and he laughs at her, shoves her away, but not without letting his hands linger.

Vala's a little bit put out, but Quetesh just bares her teeth, climbs back on to his lap and tells him he can have a crate of weapons for each orgasm. If he fails, she gets a ship. Either way, she's happy. When she grinds herself down against him, looking him in the eye, the heady scent of incense and perfume and violence thick in the air, he clutches his fingers tight on her hips.

He ends up with four crates, a sonic cannon and two of her personal guard. Later, Vala will steal one of his ships from under his nose and consider them even.

2 – The first time she propositions Teal'c, hinting at the things she could do with both limbs and lack of limitations, he just raises an eyebrow at her, doesn't bother to say no. She was mostly trying it out because he never responded when she flirted, and because it seemed unsporting not to try. But once he said no, she was determined to figure out what it would take. Vala loved a challenge. Hated liars, but loved a challenge. Besides, she didn't see him saying yes to anyone else.

She tried figuring out what he liked to do, and while sparring seemed promising – half naked, sweaty, she knew the appeal in that – she just ended up bruised and cranky. Basketball was all very well and good, but it was hardly…. Sexy. They watched a whole bunch of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and caught up on all the MGM classics and she discovered the Teal'c was an absolute sucker for Singin' in the Rain, but the red galoshes she ordered from Zappos.com with Daniel's credit card looked better on her. She showed up in Quetesh's dress with a staff weapon, and was offered a lesson in meditation. She wore a pair of short shorts and put her hair in pigtails and was told that "The Dukes of Hazzard" were 'not really his thing, in addition to casting cultural sterotypes far and wide and that Colonel Mitchell was from the south and would likely not appreciate the aspersions." She muttered that Mitchell would probably appreciate the shorts and got an "Indeed" for her troubles.

Finally, she pinned him to the couch in the lounge, hands barely curling around the swell of his biceps and asked him point blank what it would take.

"Sincerity." He intoned. She rolled her eyes. "That's it?"

She stood up, peeling off the black t-shirt, kicking off her government issue boots and unbuttoning the top of her pants, shoving them down until she stood in the lounge in her underwear. " I sincerely want to have sex," she said.

"All right," Teal'c agreed.

3 – Mitchell doesn't turn her down so much as make this face like he can't quite say what he wants to say. They're squashed up together in a closet on PX-something or other, a planet she used to just call Coralaire, but Mitchell seemed overly fond of the numbers so she doesn't press the point. His thigh was wedged up between her legs and she's hanging on to his shoulders with the butt of the AK-47 poking into her back where he held it, and something far more delightful poking into her front.

She shifted her hips enough to get one hand between them and Mitchell made another noise like he was maybe going to cry. "No," he said, and she said, "I can be quiet. Don't worry."

"Maybe not you I'm worried about," he muttered, breath warm and damp in her ear. He pulled back a little, face shadowed, then said, "Or maybe it is."

She put her hand against his cock, enjoying the shape and heft and he whispered, voice strangled and rough, "If you do that again, I will have to knock you out." She twitched her fingers, the gun pressed harder into her back. "How is that following orders?"He growled. She pressed closer, the back of her hand hitting just the right place on her sex, rolled her eyes, sighed against his cheek in pleasure and Mitchell cracked, mouth coming down onto hers, hot and hard and wet. She wriggled enough to get his fly open, enough to get her own pants into a more strategic position and then it's heat and mouths and it's sex – vaguely awkward, uncomfortable sex, but there are people on the other side of the wall who want to kill them and he seems to work well under pressure, hot and thick inside her, holding tight to the gun as she holds tight to his back, grinding against his thigh.

She hadn't lied, she can be quiet. Quiet enough so that when she hears the enemy directly outside their hiding place, she covers Mitchell's mouth with hers, digs her nails into his back as he bucks against her, shuddering in her arms. She didn't come, but they didn't die either and Mitchell's pissed off enough at himself that he doesn't bother to yell at her. In turn, she doesn't tell him that all the Coralarians wanted to do was take a little DNA, maybe give them some lunch until he's naked and sweating underneath her in her quarters on the base. Later that night, she'll also discover that human men have a very strange definition of kink. After all, who hasn't done a little bit of spanking? But he enjoys himself, so who is she to argue.

4 - Carter holds her at arms length, trying to figure out where to put her hands, finally settling for directly on her collarbone. The woman's a long shot, but Vala likes her long legs and her warm smile and it's been a long time since she had sex with a pretty woman.

"Hasn't anyone ever told you no?" Carter cocks her head to the side, earnest but intent.

"Of course," Vala shrugs, "but darling, you must know that most people are more interested in sex than saving the world."

Carter's mouth gets serious, flat and sort of wistful. "We're not most people."

It's the we, more than the most people that makes Vala smile kindly. She runs her fingers over Carter's wristbone. "Perhaps that's why I like you," she says. Shrugs. "Or not."

Carter lets her go, moving to step back towards her desk.

"I've never kissed a woman," she says, and sounds vaguely apologetic. Vala steps closer, fingers gentle underneath the other woman's chin.

"Never too late to start," she says, and kisses Sam.

5 – She only ever asks Daniel once, in a serious tone. Only ever once stands in front of him and looks him in the eye and asks him to take her to bed.

When he says he can't, she believes him, knows if he can change his mind, he'll have to come to her.

She thinks maybe she can wait. She just has to figure out if she really wants to.