Taking a deep breath
Oct. 19th, 2004 09:49 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
itsallovernowETA: Because I sound awfully calm in this post, awfully contained, and yet...
I'm not. So, so not. I'm incoherent with joy and grief, with giddiness and pure, unabashed awe and love for this show, this chapter of it, and this fandom. Awash in tears and love. And in fact have to keep hiding my face because I'm scrubbing away tears at work.
Wanted to write some things down before I read everyone else's reactions.
It didn't hit me until this morning, last night, staying up until 2 am to watch it twice through, I was still too stunned to really give into emotions. M. called me, told me he was taping it commercial free and when I got home at 10:30, I had to knock on the door then run into my room so I wouldn't catch anything inadvertently.
And I'd been unspoiled, almost exclusively. So, I just sat there, awed and shocked, gripping Mike's hand as soon as the baby was born because I just knew it wasn't going to be that easy.
First, my few fan wanks (and no, I'm not going to discuss any of the improbable or the impossible. This post is all about my love for this show. My only negative comment is that it is just so terribly unfair that we didn't get to relish this stretched out over 22 episodes, and that can hardly count as a complaint. I'm beyond grateful for this. It completely exceeded my expectations).
One - in my world, because we did not see D'Argo's head on a stick, because we saw Grunshlik and Sikozu still alive, they managed to get D'Argo onto some sort of Scarran transport and fly free. In my world, D'Argo is not dead. If this requires me reasoning it out and ficcing it into existence, I'm completely thrilled to do that.
Two - Grayza manipulated the councilor, getting pregnant to secure his loyalty - in so far as PK's offer that kind of loyalty - and using that attachment to regain her power. I like that idea far more than the idea of the offspring being John's.
Allright, to the rest:
The opening of part 2 just kicked all kinds of ass, complete with John's panic face, Aeryn getting reknocked up, kissing D' on the cheek, jumping through the hole, and Jothee gettin' 'em out of there.
The wormhole weapon knowledge kicking in was heartbreaking. Harvey found it, put all of the pieces together to show John the possibility, and Einstein released it. Einstein was taking a pretty big gamble, and the sheer focus John showed, watching Aeryn, going through the ship, touching the module, coming back bloody, the scar in the same place, the knowledge posing those same risks and his fight with Aeryn.
And it was worth it all for this.
"You don't protect me. We protect each other." This is Aeryn, that is her job. Her identity. It's why I've never had a problem with her having a child, even though I'm thrilled that they explored her own doubts. Protecting those without resources is something she does. It's inherent.
The themes of your identity, your knowledge leaking into your skin, having a visible presence was beautifully echoed as well. Blood on John's hands and face, because having the knowledge will only lead to blood, violence and death.
Loved Rygel's post-partem. Stark's completely understandable freakout. The wall of water as D'Argo's nosed scraped the bottom:)
And god, how fabulous were the shots of Moya diving into the water, John pressing Aeryn up between the bulkheads - "Told you it was fate." Beautiful references to Season 1, just gorgeous.
Aeryn talking to the baby, because of course Moya, and a pulse pistol are sounds she'd want to share.
"I'm pregnant, not incapacitated." Because she's not.
Knew the Idelons were doomed, just knew it. And hee - when the Luxans came rappelling down the cliff, M. said, "They're not Luxans, they're deluxans!"
I love that Sikozu was a spy, because her loyalties have always been suspect. And I'm glad she betrayed Scorpius, although not that she betrayed the others. It makes sense, even though there's no canon for it, she was designed to free her people, any way she could.
The pacing, and the firefight, and the birth in the middle. God I love my kick ass girl. "This woman could chew her own arm off." "I've killed men for less," and slapping John's hand. "Shooting makes me feel better." and the look that Chi and Aeryn give each other when he leaves them to it, almost rivals the D and John look when they hear from Noranti, who's been armed. Sort of.
And all of that, well, it's a wedding and a birth I can completely get behind. Messy, loud, inappropriate, and no less sexy, no less beautiful or intense than any other moment in their lives. The fabulous montage afterward, John feeling like king of the world, Aeryn with baby in one hand, gun in the other.
Killing Akhna. You do not mess with Aeryn's loved ones. It's a really frelling bad idea. Hah!!!
And then D, and I just couldn't stop bawling. Oh, D'Argo!! "Tell them who there Daddy is, tell 'em." Damn, still tearing up.
And the final confrontation, the consequences are on everyone's shoulders and I wanted to weep for John. Aeryn convinced the DRD's to build his weapon, thinking it was what he wanted, thinking it was what he needed because TJohn knew what he was doing, had a different sort of conflict and I think she took that same faith, the accelerated, more horrific circumstances and did what she thought was necessary. Her ancestry may have been founded in peace, but this is a girl born to war, and weaponry is something she understands.
And he did try to explain, as best he could - action and reaction, death and consequences. Peace through anhiliation and I've never been more proud of all of them than when they stood on Moya's command, ready to die for peace.
The whole sequence was intense, and amazing and heartbreaking and so incredibly beautiful. The glory in destruction. And Einstein, ripping the knowledge away, leaving John spent, leaving John done. Aeryn's screams, the thought that he's been sacrificed again to wormholes, that he's left her again.
I loved the 2001 ref. God, that was amazing. The same shot, the intensity and silence behind John, and the child bringing him back, going back to family, because that's where you start when you have to start somewhere.
And yes, I loved the end. Sappy, and sweet, and so richly deserved. Giving their child the stars, giving him honor and a name to live up to. Had it been any other show, any other circumstances, I'd have been turned off, but as it is, knowing that it's a moment of domestic peace, knowing that it's so unlikely that calm will reign, I was happy for them to have it. Peace between the major factions has been temporarily achieved, but Scorpy's face said he had plans, and conflict can be conflict without all out war, and we all know the temporary loyalties that peace creates. It's still not going to be an easy life for baby D, or his folks. (And yes, I want a fic where D'Argo finds them again, is unbelievably thrilled that they named the baby after him).
I loved that there were layers, metaphors of knowledge, birth and family. Consequences and sacrifice, figuring it out, because no one is going to do it for you. War and peace, and the idea that you have to make those decisions, that no amount of violence or power or threats will be enough to maintain peace if those involved aren't willing to work for it, to believe in it.
God, it was just so good. And yes, there were plenty of flaws, plenty of improbabilities, plenty of things that made me both scratch and shake my head, but at the same time it was so rich in so many ways, so much of what my show is, what it means to me- sex and love, vomit and snark, violence and responsability, and how family changes your life, how you find it, how you maintain it, what you're willing to do for it.
I refuse to look at this as an end, because it doesn't have to be. But if it's the last thing we see on screen, I can live with that. If I have to.
I'm not. So, so not. I'm incoherent with joy and grief, with giddiness and pure, unabashed awe and love for this show, this chapter of it, and this fandom. Awash in tears and love. And in fact have to keep hiding my face because I'm scrubbing away tears at work.
Wanted to write some things down before I read everyone else's reactions.
It didn't hit me until this morning, last night, staying up until 2 am to watch it twice through, I was still too stunned to really give into emotions. M. called me, told me he was taping it commercial free and when I got home at 10:30, I had to knock on the door then run into my room so I wouldn't catch anything inadvertently.
And I'd been unspoiled, almost exclusively. So, I just sat there, awed and shocked, gripping Mike's hand as soon as the baby was born because I just knew it wasn't going to be that easy.
First, my few fan wanks (and no, I'm not going to discuss any of the improbable or the impossible. This post is all about my love for this show. My only negative comment is that it is just so terribly unfair that we didn't get to relish this stretched out over 22 episodes, and that can hardly count as a complaint. I'm beyond grateful for this. It completely exceeded my expectations).
One - in my world, because we did not see D'Argo's head on a stick, because we saw Grunshlik and Sikozu still alive, they managed to get D'Argo onto some sort of Scarran transport and fly free. In my world, D'Argo is not dead. If this requires me reasoning it out and ficcing it into existence, I'm completely thrilled to do that.
Two - Grayza manipulated the councilor, getting pregnant to secure his loyalty - in so far as PK's offer that kind of loyalty - and using that attachment to regain her power. I like that idea far more than the idea of the offspring being John's.
Allright, to the rest:
The opening of part 2 just kicked all kinds of ass, complete with John's panic face, Aeryn getting reknocked up, kissing D' on the cheek, jumping through the hole, and Jothee gettin' 'em out of there.
The wormhole weapon knowledge kicking in was heartbreaking. Harvey found it, put all of the pieces together to show John the possibility, and Einstein released it. Einstein was taking a pretty big gamble, and the sheer focus John showed, watching Aeryn, going through the ship, touching the module, coming back bloody, the scar in the same place, the knowledge posing those same risks and his fight with Aeryn.
And it was worth it all for this.
"You don't protect me. We protect each other." This is Aeryn, that is her job. Her identity. It's why I've never had a problem with her having a child, even though I'm thrilled that they explored her own doubts. Protecting those without resources is something she does. It's inherent.
The themes of your identity, your knowledge leaking into your skin, having a visible presence was beautifully echoed as well. Blood on John's hands and face, because having the knowledge will only lead to blood, violence and death.
Loved Rygel's post-partem. Stark's completely understandable freakout. The wall of water as D'Argo's nosed scraped the bottom:)
And god, how fabulous were the shots of Moya diving into the water, John pressing Aeryn up between the bulkheads - "Told you it was fate." Beautiful references to Season 1, just gorgeous.
Aeryn talking to the baby, because of course Moya, and a pulse pistol are sounds she'd want to share.
"I'm pregnant, not incapacitated." Because she's not.
Knew the Idelons were doomed, just knew it. And hee - when the Luxans came rappelling down the cliff, M. said, "They're not Luxans, they're deluxans!"
I love that Sikozu was a spy, because her loyalties have always been suspect. And I'm glad she betrayed Scorpius, although not that she betrayed the others. It makes sense, even though there's no canon for it, she was designed to free her people, any way she could.
The pacing, and the firefight, and the birth in the middle. God I love my kick ass girl. "This woman could chew her own arm off." "I've killed men for less," and slapping John's hand. "Shooting makes me feel better." and the look that Chi and Aeryn give each other when he leaves them to it, almost rivals the D and John look when they hear from Noranti, who's been armed. Sort of.
And all of that, well, it's a wedding and a birth I can completely get behind. Messy, loud, inappropriate, and no less sexy, no less beautiful or intense than any other moment in their lives. The fabulous montage afterward, John feeling like king of the world, Aeryn with baby in one hand, gun in the other.
Killing Akhna. You do not mess with Aeryn's loved ones. It's a really frelling bad idea. Hah!!!
And then D, and I just couldn't stop bawling. Oh, D'Argo!! "Tell them who there Daddy is, tell 'em." Damn, still tearing up.
And the final confrontation, the consequences are on everyone's shoulders and I wanted to weep for John. Aeryn convinced the DRD's to build his weapon, thinking it was what he wanted, thinking it was what he needed because TJohn knew what he was doing, had a different sort of conflict and I think she took that same faith, the accelerated, more horrific circumstances and did what she thought was necessary. Her ancestry may have been founded in peace, but this is a girl born to war, and weaponry is something she understands.
And he did try to explain, as best he could - action and reaction, death and consequences. Peace through anhiliation and I've never been more proud of all of them than when they stood on Moya's command, ready to die for peace.
The whole sequence was intense, and amazing and heartbreaking and so incredibly beautiful. The glory in destruction. And Einstein, ripping the knowledge away, leaving John spent, leaving John done. Aeryn's screams, the thought that he's been sacrificed again to wormholes, that he's left her again.
I loved the 2001 ref. God, that was amazing. The same shot, the intensity and silence behind John, and the child bringing him back, going back to family, because that's where you start when you have to start somewhere.
And yes, I loved the end. Sappy, and sweet, and so richly deserved. Giving their child the stars, giving him honor and a name to live up to. Had it been any other show, any other circumstances, I'd have been turned off, but as it is, knowing that it's a moment of domestic peace, knowing that it's so unlikely that calm will reign, I was happy for them to have it. Peace between the major factions has been temporarily achieved, but Scorpy's face said he had plans, and conflict can be conflict without all out war, and we all know the temporary loyalties that peace creates. It's still not going to be an easy life for baby D, or his folks. (And yes, I want a fic where D'Argo finds them again, is unbelievably thrilled that they named the baby after him).
I loved that there were layers, metaphors of knowledge, birth and family. Consequences and sacrifice, figuring it out, because no one is going to do it for you. War and peace, and the idea that you have to make those decisions, that no amount of violence or power or threats will be enough to maintain peace if those involved aren't willing to work for it, to believe in it.
God, it was just so good. And yes, there were plenty of flaws, plenty of improbabilities, plenty of things that made me both scratch and shake my head, but at the same time it was so rich in so many ways, so much of what my show is, what it means to me- sex and love, vomit and snark, violence and responsability, and how family changes your life, how you find it, how you maintain it, what you're willing to do for it.
I refuse to look at this as an end, because it doesn't have to be. But if it's the last thing we see on screen, I can live with that. If I have to.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2004-10-19 05:01 pm (UTC)And I can forgive everything, really, because Aeryn was so Aeryn and John was so broken and so redeemed and it was beautiful.
no subject
Date: 2004-10-19 05:09 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-10-19 05:21 pm (UTC)And I plan on going home and watching again.
Because I can.
*g*
no subject
Date: 2004-10-19 05:32 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-10-19 05:42 pm (UTC)I'm reading everyone's reactions to the mini and I'm all teary-eyed.
The mini. Gah, it wasn't perfect but it was perfect. I just love this show and want to hug them all.
Ben and Claudia are amazing. They are the best. If they don't get Emmy nominations....
Burbank is going to be amazing and I hear 1/18/05 is the release date for the mini DVD. *g*
As for now, I've got a box of kleenex and I'm going to go rewatch the mini.
no subject
Date: 2004-10-19 05:48 pm (UTC)Ben and Claudia are amazing. They are the best. If they don't get Emmy nominations....
Oh, god, absolutely yes to all of this!
no subject
Date: 2004-10-19 05:57 pm (UTC)D'Argo... I saw it coming (too many good things happening to him) and I can see how, in terms of storytelling, he was the most appropriate choice if someone had to go--after all, he's the only one whose story really had a resolution--but still... shock and uncontrollable sobbing (god, I'm crying now, at work) and I still can't believe it happened. I'm with you, in that we didn't actually see him die so part of me still has hope that he somehow got off the planet before the wormhole ate it... I just can't imagine any future Farscape without him, without his warmth and his humor and his love of shooting things, and aside from John and Aeryn, he's the one I'm least willing to lose. That said, Farscape does goodbyes so well... I keep thinking over and over again, "Nowhere in the universe," and it makes me tear up every damn time, and it was so perfect that D'Argo's and John's last moments together involved laughter. The look on John's face as he laughed and cried and moved away, and Chiana so desperate... Gah. OK, must stop writing about this, because otherwise I will be utterly useless at work.
The whole thing was just... epic. The shots toward the end of everyone watching in horror, lit with that bright yellow and orange of the slow-growing monster John's created... Harvey's final goodbye, John finally (possibly) free, Chiana finally ready to belong somewhere, Stark finally at peace... Stark generally bugs the hell out of me, but I was so, SO happy to see him sane and balanced at last (not least because it means that if there ever is more Farscape, we won't be subject to his insane/inane ramblings at moments of crisis anymore).
Gah. Just so incredible, and if this is the end, I don't know how they could have gone out any better.
Yep, D'Argo is totally still alive... and I look forward to reading your fic about how that happened. ;)
no subject
Date: 2004-10-19 06:02 pm (UTC)One of the many, many things I love about my show is that when they do things right, no one can improve upon it:)
It was so good, so everything we wanted and needed, I think.
no subject
Date: 2004-10-19 08:38 pm (UTC)seva
no subject
Date: 2004-10-19 08:44 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-10-19 09:59 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-10-19 10:15 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-10-19 11:41 pm (UTC)thank you again for your great writing and viewpoint. *G*
no subject
Date: 2004-10-20 12:19 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-10-20 01:06 am (UTC)ps. wow, LJ is really wonky tonight...possibly overloaded and blew a fuse due to all farscape squeeing? ;)
no subject
Date: 2004-10-20 05:12 pm (UTC)Hee - that was certainly my guess when it was doing funky things:)
no subject
Date: 2004-10-20 10:14 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-10-20 01:41 pm (UTC)I agree that it wasn't perfect but it was *perfect*. We couldn't have asked for more, we were and are truly SO, so lucky. I adore cast and crew all the more after this, and I can't wait to see everyone in Burbank so we can embrace and laugh and cry and PARTY!!
(And yes, I want to read your Resurrected!D'Argo fic. :D)
no subject
Date: 2004-10-20 04:53 pm (UTC)