As a fifty-something who raised two daughters, I was lucky to have a husband to firmly believed in an equal division of labor (he's a sociologist). I work 40+ miles from home, he works 2 miles from home - so all the normal female/nurturing type jobs fell to him. Sick kid - he picked up and brought home/took to the doctor, etc. He got them ready for daycare/school and usually picked them up. Coached their soccer teams, swim dad at swim meets. And he's always done more than his fair share of chores.
As a result, my daughter's both have very firm ideas about fairness and both are feminists, whether they choose that label or not. (One does, the other doesn't.)
As someone who lived through the ERA discussions and votes, someone for whom the Roe v. Wade decision was extremely important, someone who has occasionally had to fight for credibility, I worry about the possibilities of lessening the gains that we have made in the last 30+ years (oh, that's a scary number).
When my kids were little, I made them repeat after me, every night at bedtime: "I am a competent, creative, wonderful person." In part to get through the strains of growing up, but also to reinforce their importance as individuals.
I guess the point I want to make, is that feminism doesn't just come from articulating the points of feminism. It comes from fathers seeing their daughters as important - participating with them. I comes from mothers not putting limits on what they can do - nor allowing others to do the same. It comes from having the strength of character to stand up to high school boys who accuse you of being a femi-nazi and being confident that who you are and what you believe are good things.
This isn't written particularly well - probably because I can get fairly emotional on this topic. Thanks for the opportunity - and I, too, love your final paragraph, and will set out to do something outrageous today.
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Feminism
Date: 2003-10-30 04:50 am (UTC)As a result, my daughter's both have very firm ideas about fairness and both are feminists, whether they choose that label or not. (One does, the other doesn't.)
As someone who lived through the ERA discussions and votes, someone for whom the Roe v. Wade decision was extremely important, someone who has occasionally had to fight for credibility, I worry about the possibilities of lessening the gains that we have made in the last 30+ years (oh, that's a scary number).
When my kids were little, I made them repeat after me, every night at bedtime: "I am a competent, creative, wonderful person." In part to get through the strains of growing up, but also to reinforce their importance as individuals.
I guess the point I want to make, is that feminism doesn't just come from articulating the points of feminism. It comes from fathers seeing their daughters as important - participating with them. I comes from mothers not putting limits on what they can do - nor allowing others to do the same. It comes from having the strength of character to stand up to high school boys who accuse you of being a femi-nazi and being confident that who you are and what you believe are good things.
This isn't written particularly well - probably because I can get fairly emotional on this topic. Thanks for the opportunity - and I, too, love your final paragraph, and will set out to do something outrageous today.
kc