itsallovernow | Home Again

Home from International Hussy Weekend: Hussies Ahoy.

Am tired, overstimulated, and desperately missing the other Hussies (plus auxiliary support staff the indespensible Mr. F, and the littlest hussy, version 2.0).

We achieved Urban Paradise in the not-so frozen tundra thanks to the baby pool,

rubberneck's genius shade planning, and a restaurant pan full of ice and beer. In the evening, we had a citronella candle campfire, and a light show over the water (read, an absolute need to see if sparklers could be attached to any of the floaty bath toys and sailed across the baby pool like some sort of Viking funeral. Or perhaps just wrapped around the neck of a beer bottle and left to spark like the end of Gatsby's dock).

Work exploded while I was gone, so I'm picking up the shrapnel and taping it back onto the constant ticking time bomb that represents the products of the publishing world.

To conclude I offer you the following lessons which I imparted (occasionally in song) to Hussy 2.0:

1. Nature is cruel. And will break your heart.

2. Sometimes nature likes to masquerade as a floating log. Sometimes, so do plastic hangars from Target.

3. Verbal/visual puns are never not funny. (Trying to share the content of the monkey cup with the Monkey cat will always be hilarious).

4. Everything goes better with beer, or if you're about 20 years underage, an empty beer bottle.
Yes Auntie

cretkid, if you insist on napping, I will be the one relegated to teaching science. We know that's not gonna end well. I gave it to her in the interests of science!

5. Many objects can be tested for buoyancy. I am not among them.

6. Occasionally, even pseudo-vegetarians must eat steak.

7. Lovely as it is, a blue plastic stacky cup is not exactly the trade I was looking for concerning those Dr. Who episodes.

8. Displacement is part of science. So is ratio. For instance, when you pour 3/4 of a cup of Coke zero into a baby pool, it will still be overwhelmed with water and not turn the whole pool brown. However, Auntie Thea may be a might sticky for the rest of the day. As she's the one who let you hold the cup, she has only herself to blame.

9. And in conclusion, birth control.