itsallovernow | Happy April

I dislike practical jokes and pranks. I am, in fact, completely humor deficient when it comes to those sorts of things. Part of it is my own gullibility, the way my mouth will run off with me when someone's asking a rhetorical question (I know it's rhetorical, but I can't stop my answer, cue feeling like an idiot).

I hate to see people embarrassed, much as I myself hate to be embarrassed. My mother would tell me hilarious lies when I was little – about looking outside to see a giant polka dot giraffe, things that couldn't be true, and were charming in that. I've never liked to be teased either, and she knew that.

However, I love Spring. So, welcome Spring!

***
M. has taken to entertaining himself with the canned air. He has two bottles of it, and in addition to spraying it at the cats (the white one, already too cross-eyed to see enemies approaching, just wrinkles his nose and braces for attack. Mine, sadly, freaks out completely upon even seeing the canned air), has now also taken to trying to spray me with it. If we have to call the paramedics because I've "accidentally" kicked him in the head, so be it. (This is like when I was taking Krav Maga, and he thought he was too strong for me to take down, and was so, so wrong. Of course, we didn't call the paramedics then either. But not too many boys want to admit to "injury via being a dumb ass." although I'm guessing it's a typical symptom).

However, he now has a dozen or so beer bottles lined up, all filled with various levels of beer, and is blowing the air into or over them to produce "musical works." Whether or not this is better than the "beeramid" remains to be seen.

My life? Oy. It's not even funny anymore. Okay, it's a little funny.

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I'm re-evaluating the online dating. The flurry of first dates, sadly, left me feeling more lonely than before. It makes me wonder what's wrong with me that the boys who like me, I don't like, and the one's I like turn out to be distant, or flaky, or just... bad for me.

Mostly, I was foolish, shoving all of them into a short period of time, but until I learn moderation, that sort of thing will continue to happen. I need to try and space things out, find new activities, devote some time to my writing, to figuring out how to get out of my current apartment and still be able to leave a new apartment more than once a week.

I need to work on my modern dance piece, and find some time to develop my brain.

So, an informal, "I'm too lazy to make a poll" poll.

New hobbies wherein I might meet individuals? What do the lot of you do for fun that doesn't involve the internets? What gets you out of the house and into the world?

I know some of you climb. Tell me about that! Or anything else that gives you joy.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Firstly: *waves* Hi, I added you today, hope you don't mind!

Secondly: I completely agree on not liking seeing other people be embarrassed (or be it myself, for that matter). I can hardly watch those candid camera shows without cringing.

Welcome! Don't mind a bit.

New hobbies wherein I might meet individuals? What do the lot of you do for fun that doesn't involve the internets? What gets you out of the house and into the world?

If you're specifically looking to meet guys, I would NOT recommend horses. Not many guys there, and the ones you find are usually gay. But if you're looking to meet *people*, nothing beats a barn on a weekend day for social.

OTOH, you'll soon start spending so much time at the barn you'll have to give up any other semblance of a life, so...tradeoff.

People, in general:)

what she said, about the horses. but still pretty damn wonderful, and worth doing. And if you do a western variety (say, team roping) you WILL meet guys....

I recommend aikido ;). there are actually some AMAZING dojos in Cali, too....

also, will write more about aikido, types of people you will meet etc tomorrow. if you want. but am TIRED tonight. 4 hour marathon editing and layout session with current key client....

I love volunteering with kids and teens. It's like hanging out and doing team building/games/crafts...only you get to feel good about doing it.

LA Works has some awesome projects. Children of the Night was my absolute favorite. Teen girls who were involved somehow in prostitution, pornography, or just too many pregnancies live in a school and make their lives better. If you go, tell them I say hi. I also love Reading to Kids. Once a month, saturday morning, you...read to kids. And do a craft. Angel's Flight is great too, especially if you know any Spanish. Younger teens in an interim shelter as immigration issues get worked out.

I miss my projects. The one I did this morning in Chicago sucked compared to those projects. Sigh.

Oh and though _I_ never ended up dating anyone I met on those, it was not because there aren't awesome guys that you meet. I just never was attracted to one who came back more than once. I should have given my number to that one guy, though....these guys are good guys. Rochelle's boyfriend does Reading to Kids.

I love climbing. And it is a way to meet people, especially if you climb the same time every week, you end up bumping into the same folks. The thing is, unless you're in a class, like Minnow, you sort of need a partner to start with. You can however usually put your name up on a bulletin board at the gym for climbing partners.

The people you would find at a climbing gym (or at the crag) are the folks you would expect: mostly athletic, mostly (but not entirely) white, often college students or professionals (but not only those). A pretty wide range of ages, though, from mid-teens to the 60s. It's become a lot more diverse in the last ten years: used to be just guys in their 20s, without a lot of women. Nowadays it's probably 60-40 men/women, something like that. And it's something women are good at, because our center of gravity is lower and we tend to be more flexible than men, and less dependent on upper-body strength.

If you're interested, I can take you to the gym when you come visit! Also, there are usually classes for a minimal cost at most gyms, or through REI or other outdoor stores or city rec programs.

Going on hikes via the Sierra Club, leading hikes for the local branch of the Sierra Club, participating on the board of the local neighborhood association, taking classes at the local community college, and joining fundraising half-marathon/marathon walks like Team in Training are good ways to meet people. I have lasting friendships from all those activities (I wasn't looking to date, but the Team in Training-type thing, esp. running and marathoning, is where the boys are).

I'm completely with you on not liking practical jokes or embarrassment--mine or anyone else's. It all just makes me cringe in dread, and there is no humor in cringing in dread!

And climbing!!! Like

cofax7 says, it tends to be very social: both because you cannot climb alone, and also because the gym ethos tends to be more broadly social. If you go at regular times you get to know people, you cheer each other on through hard routes and pick up tips from other people (it is not uncommon to get unsolicited advice yelled up by strangers--though there is some dispute as to the etiquette of this practice). As a social sport, I highly recommend it. And the demographic tends to be youngish but not exclusively so--there are plenty of middle-aged climbers at my gym, and one of the men I climb with regularly is pushing 70--and slightly more male than female. There are also some incredibly hot climbers out there. Just sayin'.

But the main reason I climb is that I simply adore the sport itself. It's the only thing I've ever found where I have to put my entire combined mental and physical energy into something as simple as "where do I put my foot next?" and there's something incredibly stress-relieving about that. I also find it really addictive: ideally I climb three times a week.

Three times a week! Pity you don't live nearby: my regular climbing partners have fallen away (through a combination of geography, life changes, and social kerfuffles), and I'm casting about for someone to get me to the gym more frequently.

Ideally three times a week, but I'll settle for two during busy times. Lately I've been so busy that I've done well to make it once a week with regularity, and that's not nearly enough, I'm finding. I plan to spend all summer alternating between the library (dissertation-writing) and the climbing gym--the combo is the only way the dissertation is going to get written!

I hope you can strike on a good new climbing partner or two. My regular partners have also been in limbo lately, but fortunately there are enough regulars I know that I can nearly always find someone to climb with. Not the same as having a regular partner, though.

I will say to you what I said to a dear friend who is now in the final stages of writing up his diss: you NEED to climb 2X per week, for sanity. It is CRUCIAL. But AT LEAST 1X per week. Sanity, it's nice to have that AND the PhD ;).

Yes, sanity is key, and exercise is my way to sanity. I also run a lot, which has the advantage of being less time-consuming (and a cardio complement to the climbing), but it's the climbing I'm really in love with. :)

I agree with the above commenter on doing volunteer work. You get to do good work, meet people who have a similar interest, and you have a shared activity to talk about (in addition to the shared interest). This can be with a nonprofit, a political campaign, a local library or school, etc.

There's also book clubs/reading groups. & I've always been a fan of meeting friends of friends.

Happy April

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