I think all of that's true (and totally legitimate) and for this: fangirlsnboys write about sex and don't write about solving mysteries, flying space fighters, or fighting demons.

I think... it's easier to imagine the sex, truthfully, easier to get to that point in a story because it doesn't take the same leap of... faith, imagination, creativity. It allows people to write something that they know (or not, as i've read plenty of sex driven fic that displays a painful ignorance of the actual act, as well as the characters performing it).

I'd say that my preference is for a great story with good tension and the possibility of sex between characters I'm invested in. And despite all this, I would choose good Gen over mediocre ship/sex driven fic.

For me, my gender is not the most significant or basic thing about me. For me, my gender (and who I sleep with, or that I'm sleepign with anyone) is far less intimate to me, than other things.

So part of the whole gen/not gen divide, for me, is looking for stories that reflect what I think is important, and (to a certain extent) what I value.

I definitely respect and understand that. For me, my gender is a HUGE part of my identity, not the only part, but a part I value. And I want the same thing from stories - to reflect what's important to me, to challenge me on those definitions, to make me proud of who I am, and to question it too.